There have been a things on my mind that I haven’t shared on the blog over the last few weeks about my book and writing process. The first is overcoming my massive bout of procrastination that has hit me in the last few days and the growing confusion about my book that has made me now consider that it probably has to be a duology or even a trilogy.
Slowly but surely, I am getting more motivation to look at my manuscript again and I am again enjoying writing my blog posts. I wrote for the first time on Thursday, it was like trudging through mud and the words came out slowly and with hesitation but I ended up typing 1375 words. I was very proud of myself and it motivated me. Despite having that nagging feeling to do something else, anything else, I told myself to just open the manuscript and read the last two paragraphs. Just that simple action of opening the manuscript with no promises to myself that I will actually write anything. Of course, I did write because how could I not?
I am happy that my motivation has come back. I am seeing my fellow writing friends finishing or nearly finishing their first drafts and I want to feel that same achievement. Authors are coming out with books everyday and I want to be one of them. It is not out of jealously or competition because when I see another author releasing their book, I feel proud for them. I just want to be proud of myself as well.
Then comes the other thing confusing me and holding me back. My novel is very complicated and there are many holes, despite me being a plotter there are plot points that don’t gel with me. I think that is because my book is getting too big to be contained within one stand-alone novel. Originally, my plan was that this novel would be a single book because who knows if I am going to be traditionally published or not. I wouldn’t be able to bare writing the first novel in a duology or trilogy and not being able to publish the second instalment because it wasn’t popular.
However, I have come to a point where I realised that it needs to be so much more than it is at the moment. There are so many things that I need to fit in which will not squeeze into the already gargantuan word count I have racked up. There is no way a publisher will go for this confusing mass of words I have. It needs to be split so that I can tell the story correctly and the way it deserves to be told. I have been thinking about this for months and now I have finally accepted that this is the way it must be.
My book is all in my head and it is starting to confuse me. I notice it only when someone asks me what it is about and I struggle to tell him or her, because it is so complex, how can I explain everything? I think I need to talk to someone about it and really get it out there. I have a friend called Heather who I met over Instagram and we talk about ideas all the time. Currently, I am helping her with her new book idea, so I think I will open up to her about it.
It is a scary thing to open up to someone what you book is about. I feel sort of ashamed that maybe my idea is stupid or not good enough, or that they will steal your idea. I don’t think that she would, but it’s hard you know? It is hard to build a rapport with someone and to trust him or her with your innermost thoughts. However, this is why I started this writing journey- to build relationships with other writers. I can’t talk about it with people I know in my own life, because they are not writers and it is different when you talk with someone who understands your plight.
I will spend the next few weeks writing my chapters and looking at my plot again to see where I can split it into two books. I like duologies better than trilogies because I feel that either the last book is lacking or the middle is a filler. Two is good, but who knows it may end up being a trilogy or more.
Do you have any advice about splitting your plot across multiple books? Or, your own experiences with a writing buddy? I am afraid to start talking about the details of my book on my blog and I was wondering if you guys would like to know more about it? I feel shy and think that maybe you wouldn’t? I don’t want to pressure you… Is that strange? I think it is. Let me know!